Young and Invincible

Sometimes I look back at my life and I wonder how I have managed to stay alive. I have made some ridiculous decisions.

One of these decisions was to hitchhike from Zimbabwe to Malawi, via Zambia, by myself. Malawi is said to be a fantastic country, with its aquamarine gem of Lake Malawi balancing out the forested northern highlands, it is reputed to be a magical place and I wanted to find out for myself.

So I packed my bags, got dropped off on the outskirts of Harare, and with a sign with 'Malawi' written on it, waited for a ride to Lake Kariba. That first section was pretty easy, I was in familiar territory, I knew Zimbabwe very well and I got a one-stop ride all the way to Kariba. After an overnight at Kariba I managed to easily gets across the board into Zambia having got a ride from a very pleasant lady and her daughter. I was in luck, as they were driving all the way to Lusaka.

However, I did not realise that they were born-again Christians (not that I take a particular dislike to born-again Christians), but they were over zealous in my protection and it took me three days to break away from their place in Lusaka. I mean, three days! They were concerned about my welfare and were trying to find me a ride, but after 48-hours it was becoming a rather painful process. I eventually persuaded them to drop me on the outskirts of Lusaka where I would try and hitch a ride through the eastern section of Zambia to the Malawi border. Unfortunately they dropped me in the afternoon – it is a six-hour drive to the border, with nothing much in between, and it was at this point that I questioned my decision-making process. I also question their decision-making, as they were concerned about my welfare and had left me in the middle of nowhere with a rather unachievable goal.

I waited. I waited in the searing heat. I waited in the searing heat and consumed most of my water. When I started drinking my second bottle of water I mentally began to look at my options. Whilst in thought, a large pristine white vehicle pulled up and a guy got out and asked me where I was going.

" Malawi," I said, "or anywhere near the border would be great."
"You are in luck," said Andy (whose name I found out later), " where are the others?"
" What others?"
"Well surely it is not just a you travelling, where are the other hitchhikers?"
"No, it is really just me."

Andy could not believe this, picked up my bag and put it in the back of the truck, whilst still looking surreptitiously into the undergrowth for the rest of my group. When he realised that I actually was travelling by myself, we set off along the potholed road towards Malawi.

"Fancy a drink? There are cold beers in the fridge." The fridge happens to be between the driver and passenger seat. Lady luck was certainly travelling with me.

I was young, I was invincible and I was so terribly naive. But I made it to Malawi (in one piece), and it is a magical country and Lake Malawi is an incredible place. I loved it so much that I spent six weeks there, and that was just the first of many a glorious time in Malawi.

'Sense' Malawi for yourself.

Sun Salutations on Safari

Picture this, you are sitting on the edge of the plunge pool, your legs dangling in the cool water and the warm sun heats your tired bones in your back. You look up, and there in the distance is a herd of elephants, gradually making their way towards you and the waterhole below you. You don't really have to move, you can just sit there and watch the elephants plod to the waterhole for their afternoon drink.

Pure heaven.

Hairy Spiders, a Pick Axe and a Blade of Grass

Many years ago I lived in the Zimbabwean bush, in a small round mud hut with my own small vegetable patch and in the middle of nowhere. I did spend many nights by myself there, which at times was rather disconcerting as there was no door on my mud hut, and I had heard a leopard 'coughing' nearby. Most of the time, however, I was project managing a group of volunteers who were helping me with my scientific survey work. When they arrived the area changed and became a sea of tents – living quarters, medical tents and cooking areas. And it was outside one of these tents that a mini adventure began.

Late one night I was walking over to the medical tent when I noticed four big, fat, hairy legs poking out of a hole in the ground, right in front of the entrance into the medical tent, typical. This was going to be trouble.

The next morning I called Epheus over to get his opinion on the matter. Epheus was my camp guard, a wizened, elderly, local guy who had worked in the area for Lord knows how many years, and was an oracle in all things in the African bush.

"Aah, it eez not gud", said Epheus while shaking his head. "This eez very bad", he said, peering into the hole.
"I know that" I said frustratingly, " But can you do anything about it? And you mustn't kill it."

Epheus smiled and walked away leaving me dumbfounded. He then returned with a pick axe and a blade of grass - not the usual implements for removing a big fat hairy spider, but he was my expert after all, so I watched with curiosity. By now there was a growing number of people peering into the hole and shivering at the thought of a rather large fat spider just outside the medical tent. Ironic really, as this particular spider, at the baboon spider, had a very nasty bite.

Epheus looks at me, with a knowing smile, and delicately put the blade of grass into the hole and jiggled it around with his left hand. Meanwhile his right hand was raised above his head, brandishing the pick axe. His left hand was still working hard with the blade of grass and then all of a sudden he froze, and we held our breath. The pick axe came down with full force and he started digging up a considerable bit of the area before throwing the pick axe away and surveying his destruction.

And then out of nowhere loomed the spider, boulders cascading off its back and probably not too happy with its current situation. Epheus pounced on the spider, laying his right hand flat across the thorax of this monstrosity, and then manoeuvring his fingers round so he could pick the spider safely up without getting bitten himself. The spider was nearly as big as his hand, with its legs outstretched, and as Epheus brought it close to my face I could see its poisonous biting mouth parts pretty well. too close for my liking, far too close.

I did not flinch. This was not the desired effect that Epheus wanted from me, so he turned to Lucy, did the same, she shrieked, providing the right effect. The result was Lucy being chased by an old wizened man hobbling after her with a spider, it could've resembled a Benny Hill film. I was just glad that it wasn't me.

There is always something unexpected to see in Africa, whether it be fat or thin, hairy or scaly, humongous or teeny, Africa has it all. Looking back at this event I realise that things can be put into perspective and what is important in life is often re-addressed. The smaller things are often just as important as what we consider the larger things in our lives, and being in the wilderness of Africa helps us to recognise this.

Gain a sense of balance in your life.

As I flew the Plane Hattie was Sick

The Okavango is one of the world's largest deltas and often referred to as "the river that never finds this the sea". It is a peaceful and isolated oasis set in Botswana's harsh Kalahari Desert. A visit to Botswana, without visiting the Okavango, is a sin.

There are really only two ways to see the Okavango, by mekoro and by air.

A mekoro is a wooden dugout canoe made from local jackal berry, marula or sausage trees. These trees are used as they invariably grow tall and straight and have strong wood which is favourable for carving. Before tourists visited the area the demand on local resources for mekoros was relatively small, but with the onset of tourism there's been an increase in trips into the Delta. Luckily, a new type of mekoro has emerged which has a limited impact on the forest, these are in the form of fibreglass canoes, modelled on the original mekoro.

I remember the first time I settled into a mekoro, the poler pushed our mekoro away from the land and we glided into the clear waters of the Okavango. We floated past waterlilies with their bright white flowers opening up to the blue sky, past storks elegantly moving through the water and a herd of antelope galloping along the edges of the waterway. Our guide had very good eyes and was able to spot wildlife from far and it was not long before we saw an enormous herd of elephants drinking the cool crystal water. We had come down wind from them so we had not disturb the herd and we spent over an hour watching these animals in amazement. For most the members on this trip, this was their first ever sighting of elephants, and to see so many was a real treat. It was truly magical.

The other way of seeing the Okavango is by air. This is a completely different experience and not really for the fainthearted. You can charter a plane for about 40 min to take you over the Okavango, spotting vast herds of buffalo and elephant from the skies. My advice would be to make sure you sit next to the pilot, as the views are tremendous. The best way to engineer this is to get into your group of four, the plane only carries five people one of which is the pilot, and make sure you're last in the queue. This will ensure that you are sitting next to the pilot in the co-pilot's seat. And if you are very clever the pilot may even allow you to fly the plane for a bit.

That was when Hattie was sick. It is quite tricky flying a plane, keeping the horizon steady and also trying to see the animals at the same time. I probably only flew the plane for 10 min and by that time Hattie had been sick and the other two people were begging for me to hand over the controls!

So when you go to Botswana, make sure you visit the Okavango. Take time to spend at least a day in a mekoro and when you get into a plane make sure I am not sitting in the co-pilot seat!